


Piper McLean's Guide To High School Romance

by sakurabaibai



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Gen, Love Life Advice, M/M, Matchmaking, Rated teen for language, actually the only actual characters in this are nico and piper, basically piper gives nico advice about will solace, idk why i wrote this ngl, kind of a character study a little bit, nico is disaster gay, nico you are hopeless, nurse’s office, piper nico brotp, will isn’t actually in it they just talk about him a lot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-23 06:29:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23373796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sakurabaibai/pseuds/sakurabaibai
Summary: “I think this is a waste.” He decides. Piper is taken aback. One word, and he’s lost all hope? Did Piper majorly offend him or something? Nico looks off to the distance wistfully. “Fuck romance.” Piper thinks truer words have never been spoken, but she hopes giving up on things is not Nico di Angelo’s usual method of living.She opts for the romcom best friend thing again. “Don’t be like that. I’m sure this is worth it. The anxiety goes away after a little while.”Nico shifts his eyes to look at her, gaze weirdly intense. “You don’t know me,” He comments. Piper is close to telling him she is late to her after-school activities she conveniently forgot about (those activities being going home, making mac and cheese, and playing MarioKart), but she decides to hold out a little bit longer, though it may pain her.
Relationships: Nico di Angelo/Will Solace
Comments: 9
Kudos: 51





	Piper McLean's Guide To High School Romance

**Author's Note:**

> hi so basically i wrote this all in one sitting because i have corona so no physical energy but also a lot of mental energy and i needed to get it all out somehow. there is legitimately no point to this fic whatsoever but i was thinking i might make it a series if people actually like it, though it’s good on its own for now
> 
> also: this is the first riordanverse fic i have ever managed to post. i have read the series eight times over but idk i might have still made them a little ooc for comedy or whatever. just bear with me here. thanks for reading this i appreciate it

If there’s anything in her life that confuses her the most, it’s why exactly her friends always come to her when they need advice about their love lives. The only relationship she’s been in ended almost as quickly as it started, although they remain on good terms. She gets to see the sides of people no one else does, and usually, it makes her feel like the best friend in a romantic comedy.

Right now, Piper McLean sits in an otherwise empty library with Nico di Angelo, the last person she would have expected to ask her for any kind of guidance. It’s not because she assumes Nico could handle any love issues on his own, he just doesn’t seem like the person to want help with them. If he’s asking her, who he doesn’t even know super well, then things are most likely unbearably bad.

They sit in silence, as Nico looks very intensely at his hands, which lay on the table they usually use for their study group. He’s got a total of three band-aids on his hands (two on the right, one on the left), which Piper notes as unusual. She doesn’t really want to ask Nico what’s wrong because usually he has an aura of wanting to vaporize everyone he interacts with, but when he’s emotionally vulnerable it is especially intense. Piper wonders if the kid (who barely measures 5’3”) knows he is generally avoided by people that don’t know him already. That makes her kind of sad, because Nico’s actually really nice and would probably cry if he killed an ant, but still seems like someone who would curse you at the same time.

Nico looks up at her wordlessly. Everything about him looks a little wild: from his dark hair to the glint in his eyes, and it makes him look like he’s either gotten no sleep in the past week or just woken up. Piper isn’t sure how to begin a conversation so she stares at him awkwardly, the two studying each other like lions in the wild, any sudden movement causing them to lunge at each other's' throats.

“So,” Piper begins, choosing the absolute worst way to start talking to someone, maybe ever in the history of mankind. Nico sighs.

“I think this is a waste.” He decides. Piper is taken aback. One word, and he’s lost all hope? Did Piper majorly offend him or something? Nico looks off to the distance wistfully. “Fuck romance.” Piper thinks truer words have never been spoken, but she hopes giving up on things is not Nico di Angelo’s usual method of living.

She opts for the romcom best friend thing again. “Don’t be like that. I’m sure this is worth it. The anxiety goes away after a little while.”

Nico shifts his eyes to look at her, gaze weirdly intense. “You don’t know me,” He comments. Piper is close to telling him she is late to her after-school activities she conveniently forgot about (those activities being going home, making mac and cheese, and playing MarioKart), but she decides to hold out a little bit longer, though it may pain her.

“It’s a crush, I’m not helping you ghostwrite your autobiography or anything.” Piper says plainly. “Just tell me what the situation is, I’ll give you advice, you follow it, you’re happy, I’m happy, that’s it. I’m not, like, your therapist.” Nico seems to consider this genuinely which Piper takes as a win, because at least she’s getting something through his head.

Nico is still quiet after a few minutes of sitting there. He studies Piper again, then asks, “How do I know I can trust you?” Piper decides to save him the eyeroll and the sarcastic comments.

“I’ll probably forget everything you tell me after we leave, because all I care about is you figuring out your love life, I couldn’t care less about rumors. Also I’ve done this for about half the grade already and I’ve never told anyone anything that wasn’t their business.” Piper pledges. “You’re in my friend circle, Nico, I’m closer to you than I am to most of the people that ask me for advice. I’m not going to stab you in the back, and honestly I don’t understand what’s interesting about that in the first place.”

Nico raises an eyebrow. “Fine.” he deadpans. Piper is about to ask about his situation until he adds, “Tell anyone and I’ll kill you,” and Piper isn’t sure if he’s joking or not. She chooses to not find out.

“Okay, well then,” Piper inhales, ready to get this over with. “Who’s the crush?”

Nico frowns at her. “Do I have to give you a name?”

Piper considers this. “Not really, if you know them well enough to describe their personality.”

Nico is quiet for a beat. “He’s pretty,” He suggests, as though he’s been thinking it over.

“Is that all you’ve got?”

A pause. “Yeah. I don’t… uh… interact with him much, I guess?” Nico says, though he doesn’t seem sure.

“Well, step one of winning over your crush: for gods’ sake, get ready to have some interactions.” Piper instructs. Nico looks hopeless. “What are his interests?” Nico thinks this over again, like he’s making it up as he goes or doesn’t remember.

“I think he’s on the varsity soccer team.” Nico replies. _A pretty boy in varsity soccer! That narrows it down!_ Piper tries not to groan.

“Do you have any other information?” She begs, getting a head shake in reply.

“Nope.” _Great._

Piper begins to think of other possible methods of cracking open the clam that is Nico di Angelo. “Can you describe him? Like his physical appearance?” This seems to be the one subject Nico actually knows things about.

“He’s blonde, kinda tall, blue eyes-” Nico lists. Piper’s jaw drops.

“Jason Grace?” she asks incredulously. Nico glares at her, which in some people is a clear indication she guessed wrong, but with him could also mean he’s pissed she got it right.

“No offense to Jason, but hell no,” Nico denies, which Piper can definitely understand. Jason doesn’t really seem like his type, anyway, and even if he was, Nico doesn’t really seem like Jason’s type, either. She remembers Jason saying he sees Nico like a little brother. But if it isn’t Jason, she has no idea who else it could be. She recalls there being a few other blonds on the soccer team, other than Jason, but no names or faces.

“Another blond on the soccer team, hm?” Piper questions absentmindedly. “I don’t think I know any of their names.” Nico looks at her blankly.

“Seriously?” He seems surprised. Piper thinks a little harder, embarrassed that she (a supposed social butterfly) wouldn’t know the names of some of her closest friend’s friends, especially if Nico did. No offense to him, or anything. They just lead very different social lives.

“Malcolm Pace is blond and plays soccer,” she notes. “But he’s not very tall…”

“He’s not,” Nico agrees. Piper detects a ghost of a smile in his otherwise nonchalant expression, like he’s trying not to laugh. “I’m not trying to sell myself out, but honestly, I thought it was kind of obvious. I can’t believe you don’t know who I’m talking about.” Piper shakes her head at a loss. “He’s a total science nerd, if that helps. I know, ‘cause I’m in his anatomy class.”

Piper digests this information. “So you, Nico di Angelo, Supreme Lord of Darkness, have a crush on a blond anatomy nerd that plays varsity soccer?” She then blurts without thinking, as it’s the first thing that comes to mind. Nico suddenly looks like he wants to punch her in the gut.

“He wants to be a doctor. We are taking anatomy for very different reasons,” he says, gritting his teeth. “Never call me that ever again.” With the glint in his eyes, Piper realizes she completely means it when she agrees with him. Nico’s mention of his crush wanting to be a doctor nags at her, but she can’t remember who exactly it is she’s thinking of.

She’s reminded of last week, when she had to go to the nurse’s office for a migraine. She spaces out for a second, remembering how that day had gone (not very well: the migraine had set in not even halfway through second period, and she’d made a pretty bad impression on the assistant nurse working at the time, as Piper with a migraine is never very pleasant to be around), until Nico begins to drum his fingertips on the table. She notices the band-aids on them again, and eventually, the pieces and memories start to start to click into place. “Nico, didn’t I see you at the nurse’s office last week?” She asks. Nico’s hands freeze.

“What does that have to do with romance advice?” He retorts.

“Answer the question.” Piper replies.

“Yes. On Tuesday.” Nico sighs in defeat.

Piper smirks. “You get an awful lot of random cuts on your fingers.” Nico looks at her like she’s grown a second head though Piper can detect thinly veiled dismay in the expression, and it becomes clear Nico is only pretending he has no idea where she’s going with this. He puts his hands in the pockets of his black hoodie and leans back on his chair.

“We’re getting off track here, aren’t we? Like I said, I think this whole thing is hopeless.” Nico makes an attempt to shut Piper down, but she has no intention of letting it go now.

“Di Angelo, I’m about as dumb as you are inconspicuous. Meaning, of course, you can’t fool me, because you’re really really obvious.” Piper insists. “That student nurse, right? The blond one?” Nico looks sheepish- god, is that a blush on his cheeks?- but doesn’t deny it. “What’s his name… Walt? W-” Nico seems to snap back to life in a panic, covering her mouth with the palm of his hand.

“Shut up, what if someone hears you?” He mutters, as though she was about to yell some extremely important top secret government information in front of a crowd. “I don’t think he knows yet, and I don’t want him to, honestly.”

Piper suppresses a laugh as she grabs Nico’s wrist and pushes his hand away from her mouth. “Listen, I get that, but I think he probably knows already, so long as he doesn’t have the detective skills of a doorknob. There is no way he would play along with you if he didn’t know you were faking it. Also, we are literally the only people in this library, except maybe a librarian in the staff offices, which means there’s a door between us anyway.” Nico is still set on proving her wrong somehow, and this makes Piper realize their entire discussion has completely changed her impression of him.

“I’m not faking it!” Nico protests with another burst of anxious energy. “These are very real papercuts!” Piper considers this, as they very well may be.

“I get a papercut maybe once a month,” she says. “And usually, I don’t have to go to the nurse’s office to get a bandaid for them, because they don’t bleed for more than a second. I just suck on my finger for a bit and it scabs over and it’s gone. You got a papercut last Tuesday, then assuming it went away after a few days and you threw away the bandaid, you’ve gotten at least three new ones since then. Isn’t that a little suspicious?”

Nico shrugs. “I’m just unlucky.”

Piper stares him down. “And very dramatic.” Nico scowls, and she decides to push him a little farther. “You hadn’t even gone back to class when I left the nurse’s office early to go home. Last time I checked, you shouldn’t even have to talk to the nurse to get a bandaid, they’re all in a little dish thing on the desk in the front of the office. You could have just taken one and went.” Nico sighs.

“Honestly, I think this is the strangest form of flirting I have ever encountered in real life. This somehow feels like it belongs in a fanfiction.” Piper would not like to be asked how she knows how to identify situations that seem like they belong in fanfictions, but she is definitely certain most romance is not like fanfiction at all. This fact never fails to disappoint her.

Nico seems to skim over the fanfiction thing, which Piper is thankful for. “It’s not flirting.” he argues.

“Nico, you ‘accidentally’ get a papercut like twice a week and have to go to the nurse’s office, and then somehow you take copious amounts of time asking for a bandaid, which are just sitting there on the desk, and what’s-his-name doesn’t point any of this out to you and instead plays along. You’re making excuses to talk to him. That’s, like, the textbook definition of flirting.” Nico stares very intently at the completely empty table in front of them. “Also, please do not tell me you don’t interact with him much. That’s a drastic understatement.”

He’s silent for a few more seconds, and Piper is too, wondering where to go from here. She’s trying to think of something to say, but to her surprise, Nico speaks first. “I don’t even know why I do it.” His voice is soft, completely contradicting his guarded and stubborn attitude Piper had seen not five minutes ago.

“What’s that mean?” She speaks slowly, carefully.

Nico looks up at her with wide eyes, like a deer caught in headlights. “Well obviously, I like him a lot, but I’m digging myself into a hole, and it’s just getting deeper and deeper. It’s not like I can stop now, right? It’s now or never.” Piper has seen many sides of Nico today: emo, contrary, stubborn, and finally to top it off, emotionally vulnerable. She decides his ‘emotionally vulnerable’ side is the most terrifying out of all of them.

“I’m not sure I follow.” Piper decides the best way to keep Nico from guarding his expression again is to let him talk and not put words in his mouth, in case she gets something wrong and he shuts down.

“Well, it started when I got a bloody nose a month or so ago, and he was there, so I waited for my nose to stop bleeding while he handed me tissues.” Nico explains.

“Romantic.” Piper muses sarcastically. Nico shoots her a dark look and she decides to shut up.

“So anyway, he helps me with my bloody nose, right? And he’s so annoyingly insistent that I drink water right away afterwards, and not tilt my head back so the blood doesn’t clog my throat or whatever, and then asks stuff like ‘Do you need to nap because you lost a lot of blood and I don’t want you to faint’, and ‘Does this happen often’, and I don’t know why, but it’s so stupidly charming. It’s probably because he’s really attractive, but then he seemed annoyed when I told him I hadn’t gone to bed until like three a.m. the night before instead of joking about it like people would usually do when I told them about my unideal sleeping patterns, and then I realized it was because he actually cared about my wellbeing. How weird is that?” Nico talks very fast, like he’s either running out of time or doesn’t want to dwell on anything for too long.

Nico looks at Piper for a second like he’s expecting her to answer the question he just posed, but then right as she’s about to say something like _you’re absurd_ he continues to lament about cute boys that do what they’re supposed to during their Community Involvement period, which just happens to include caring about his health. “So, anyway, I start to get kind of hellbent on proving to someone- I don’t even know who- that I don’t actually like him all that much, which for some reason means going out of my way to see him, as like, a test. I don’t even remember when we started, like, actually talking. I think it was because of anatomy? Like one day- maybe the second papercut?- I was feeling kind of daring so I came in and got a bandaid and then I said something about how he was in my anatomy class and how I forgot which page we were on in the textbook, and he gave me the page numbers.”

Piper is very fascinated with how Nico, usually a kid of few words, is suddenly so profuse with thought when before this it seemed like he wanted to talk about anything other than the nurse’s office student volunteer Piper can’t even remember the name of. He reminds her of a balloon filled with air and then let go before the bottom is tied, flying furiously around the room in a high-pitched frenzy. Piper says something really intelligent, like “Uh-huh,” to show she’s listening.

“So ever since then we’ve started talking more and more, but it’s usually not small talk. Like with a friend, you’d be more familiar, right? But with him, he asks me stuff like ‘You’re sleeping better, right?’ and then I’d reply with ‘Yeah’ and he would say something along the lines of ‘I can tell because you look more well-rested and bright-eyed’. Who notices that kind of stuff without trying to? So it’s obvious he’s, like, checking me out, or something.” Piper shrugs as she thinks Nico is drawing a lot of conclusions there, although it is definitely a possibility.

She decides this is her chance to get a word in sideways. “Nico, who is he?” Nico sighs again and looks at his lap. “My memory generally fails me when it comes to things I experience during a migraine as the only thing I register are very smart thoughts like ‘someone please turn off the lights’. So I don’t remember.”

Turning to make eye contact with her, Nico’s mouth opens and closes like a goldfish, as though he’s trying to get words out but can’t remember exactly how to form them. He gives up and hangs his head.

“Will Solace.” Nico confesses, and the name feels like a slap in the face.

Piper’s eyes widen so far she feels like a bug. “Will Solace? Like the guy currently in the lead in the student body president election? Friends with most of the school? The absolutely unattainable heartthrob perfect fucking Will Solace?” Nico grimaces.

“That’s the one.” He confirms. “He’s also… the president of the GSA.” He adds. “Reyna dragged me to a meeting at the beginning of this year, before this all started happening. Not a very well-known fact about him, I guess, but… probably more than a little relevant in this situation.” He seems unfazed at Piper’s reaction.

“And he plays varsity soccer? How does he have all that time?” Piper wonders aloud. Nico nods and shrugs passively, like he’s already spent days asking himself the same questions. “So, let me get this straight. You’ve been flirting with _Will Solace_ for the past month by getting papercuts and you’re in love with him now.”

Nico winces. “Strong wording, but… I guess so.” Piper is speechless.

“Okay. Cool. Not who I expected, like, at all. I was thinking that Jason doesn’t really seem like your type, but now I’m beginning to think Jason is a watered down version of your type. You know, once in a while I look at Will Solace and I have to squint because he looks like a highlighter. He’s so bright I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s made out of sunlight.”

Nico looks at her sadly. “I know.” He mourns.

“And you, on the other hand, are like a black sharpie. You haven’t worn anything with color since last year.”

“That’s not true,” Nico lifts his leg and pulls up the ankle of his black skinny jeans to reveal the fluffy light pink mid-calf sized sock he’s wearing under a worn black Doc Marten. “See? These are my favorite socks,” He deadpans, “And no matter who you try to tell, no one will ever believe you.” He lets go of the cuff and lowers his leg. Piper has vertigo.

“Oh,” she says. “So… Uh… Will Solace?”

“Yeah. Right.” Nico muses. “Can you believe I started going to bed at a regular time because of a cute boy? I can’t believe what the mess I’m in right now. Nothing good comes out of crushes. I wanted to hold hands but now I’m stuck with a normal sleep schedule, in-depth knowledge on how to fake papercuts, and a boy who is apparently flirting with me?” Nico turns to make eye contact with Piper, his eyes fearful. “Piper,” he says. “I don’t know how to flirt.”

Out of all of the people she has ever helped, Piper decides Nico di Angelo is the most entertaining case so far. “You’re obviously alright at it if Will fucking Solace has been flirting with you for the past month. Even though you just realized it. If you had been unresponsive he probably would have given up. I can give you some tips, though.” Piper suggests. She decides to continue, because Nico looks like he’s going to cry any moment now.

“So basically, it’s all mostly in the body language.” Piper begins the same old speech she usually gives. “You can make even, like, the weather an interesting topic if you play into it enough. A common one you hear is eye contact, but there’s also stuff like smiling-”

“I can’t do that.” Nico interrupts.

“Come again?”

“Look at him. Or smile.”

“Oh.” Piper frowns.

“He’s usually looking at me. So that would be awkward. I can’t just look back at him.” Nico says. “I can only look at him when he’s not looking at me. Otherwise I think I would die.” Piper feels like she’s going to faint.

“You won’t, but okay,” Too tired to argue at this point, Piper considers her other options.

“And smiling. I don’t really do that.” Nico explains, like it’s a lifestyle he has chosen.

“That’s not true,” Piper injects.

“What?”

“A few minutes ago, you smiled at me because you thought it was funny I couldn’t remember any of the blonds on the varsity soccer team.” Piper points out. “Step two of winning over your crush is trusting yourself. Don’t pretend you’re something you’re not.”

Nico furrows his brow. “But I’m not pretending I’m something I’m not.” He clears his throat. “Piper, don’t pretend I don’t know people are scared of me.” The comment stings. “I don’t smile. People don’t generally like to be around me.”

Again, Piper feels like a character in a romantic comedy, but this time a specifically teen-specific romantic comedy. “Solace obviously does. So whatever you’ve been doing around him is working. You told me yourself, you started going to see him- you thought- because you wanted to prove yourself wrong. But clearly, all along, you were just proving yourself right. No matter how many times you might try to close yourself off from people, it won’t work. You’ve got feelings, di Angelo, and like I said earlier, you’re in love in spite of yourself. People are afraid of the person you pretend to be, not you.”

They’re silent for a few moments as Nico plays with his hands in his lap and Piper watches him. “Then what am I supposed to do?” He asks her softly, not looking up.

“Duh,” she says plainly. “You have to ask him out. You’ll never know how he’ll react if you don’t try.” Nico’s head shoots up in panic.

“I can’t. I don’t know how to ask people out. Especially not Will Solace.”

“Then be a little more lowkey about it. You do projects and labs in anatomy, right?” She doesn’t even know why she needs to ask. As a vegetarian, the labs she’s heard anatomy kids talk about are more than she could ever handle.

“Yeah.”

“Then ask to work with him in a lab or on a project or something. Remember step one? Interactions.” Feeling like a first grade teacher, Piper has the urge to print out a poster of all the ‘steps to winning over your crush’ in rainbow Comic Sans font and tape it to her forehead. She hates the fact that she’s actually come up with a list but even more hates the fact that that list gets used.

Furrowing his dark eyebrows again, Nico looks like he’s considering this. “I could do that. There’s a project coming up in a few weeks, I think. I could ask him. I could mention it to him the next time I see him.” Piper nods a little more enthusiastically than she’d like to admit.

“Exactly. And if- when- he says yes, you just gotta be yourself. I know Will Solace relatively well. He’s laid-back and gentle and very, very good at masking any emotion he thinks might come off as a burden to the people around him, but he’s also really stuck in his ways. Will Solace is not easily swayed. He is not as carefree as you think he is.”

Nico blinks. “Why are you so good at that?”

“What?”

“Describing people. Reading people.”

“I get it from the same trait that allows me to give people love advice though my personal love life is completely abysmal.” Piper guesses in a monotone voice. “Not sure what that trait is or whether it’s a blessing or a curse.”

“Ah,” Nico muses. “One more thing.”

“Yeah?” Glad to hear there is only one more thing Nico di Angelo wants from her, Piper decides mac and cheese and MarioKart sounds great right now.

“Even though he’s like this school’s golden boy, and sometimes I have so much trouble bringing myself to get out of bed I miss full weeks of school, do you still think we could actually date?” It takes Piper a few moments to think about his question. No matter what, Nico deserves an honest answer.

“Honestly? Yeah,” Piper says. “It’s like, you’re so different you’re similar.” Nico raises an eyebrow like he doesn’t really understand, but doesn’t say anything. “You’ll see what I mean when you get to know him better.”

“Oh. Okay.”

“Anything else?” Piper asks. Nico shakes his head. “Cool.”

“Thanks, Piper,” he says it sincerely.

“No problem,” she replies. They sit in silence for a few seconds as neither of them actually start to leave. “Make sure you update me,” she adds. As he stands up and pushes in his chair, Nico nods in agreement. Sighing, Piper stands and picks up her backpack leaning on the nearest table leg, swinging it over her shoulder.

“Just checking- study group here tomorrow, right?”

“Yep,” Piper confirms, popping the P for emphasis.

“Okay. Cool. See you later.” Nico says over his shoulder as he walks away. He gives Piper a tiny wave that she returns. It isn’t until his back is turned Piper realizes he had been genuinely smiling.

**Author's Note:**

> twitter @/shuwarinTV  
> tumblr deathbrea-th (send me an ask if u want!)
> 
> edit: so it seems people want updates/more of a story: that will come along soon! i'm going to focus on updating my older, already planned out stories first before i update this. i also need to actually plot a few more chapters if i'm going to write more, because honestly, i dont really have any idea where the story would go after this. so it'll take some planning. tl;dr, it'll take awhile but this fic will be updated. just be patient


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